I SEE GREEN!
Not just inside, either. Because it’s April! The grass is finally visible and the garden has some lil flowers poppin up and my shoulders are finally relaxing after a long, isolating winter.
By the way, please be impressed by the fact that this **thriving** monstera plant was sent to me two years ago by our friends Alex and Sonja. Not only was it a miracle in and of itself that I was able to revive it after an extended sit in a USPS package in the hot sun on the front steps while we were on vacation (doh), but I have now successfully pruned, repotted, and kept it growing new leaves for exactly 728 days. That is not an exaggeration. Literally 728 days. Thank you for your applause.
Okay, coffee date. Today I’m drinking a decaf vanilla almond latte (standard) and eating those sugary-salty dark chocolate almonds from Trader Joe’s because I have a real problem.
What’s in your glass today?
Cheers. Here’s to April!
Can We Please Talk About Breastfeeding
Okay, one person did, in fact, ask me to talk about this.
- 0-2 months: Breastfeeding is lovely, natural, awesome. I am proud of us, I am proud of myself, I feel like we got so lucky to have so few issues. We’ve been given the thumbs up from lactation consultants and Solvi’s doctor – she’s gaining weight, her latch is great, milk supply is awesome. We got this. Breastfeeding in public? Easy and convenient, no cover needed. I don’t even think twice about it.
- 3-4 months: UM WHAT HAPPENED. Breastfeeding has fallen apart. Every three hours we sit down to try again and it is extremely stressful. There is (baby) screaming, there is (mom) fighting back tears, there are bottles given in desperation. The mere thought of breastfeeding in public now gives me hives. I consider quitting altogether. “Whatever you do, don’t be stressed,” they say. Because the best way to help someone not be stressed is sound the alarm that they might be too stressed? I start to get snarky. I feel so guilty – am I doing something wrong? shouldn’t I be good at this? – and I am so deeply, deeply sad that my baby loves a bottle more than she loves me. (False reasoning, but you get the idea.) We try lots and lots of things, but none of them seem to help. At one point a very well-meaning lactation consultant suggests that maybe Solvi is struggling because I’ve gone back to work. Cue deep shame spiral.
- 5-7 months: Slowly things get better, but not for any clear reason. And now breastfeeding is… just breastfeeding. It’s not perfect. There are frustrating moments – Solvi is squirmy and distracted, she latches on and off, she doesn’t always like how I’m holding her. But she’s gaining weight (like, a lot of it) and she’s generally happy. And I’m generally happy. I am still not comfortable enough to breastfeed out in the open for dislike of nursing covers and fear that she will not stay put long enough to keep me from exposing too much. But I have moments where she’s in my tucked up in my lap at home and all is right in the world and I think, yes. Okay. This.
So there you have it. I am grateful that we’ve made it this far – I could have never made it if not for a very supportive husband, several excellent lactation consultants, and friends and family with years of experience answering SOS text messages in the middle of the night.
Note: We give Solvi a bottle every night before bed. It’s something we started during the 3-4 month Desperation Phase – not intentional, just survival – but it has just become a standard part of our routine. I get a break, she gets time with Dad, and then when we have a babysitter, she’s still able to “keep her routine.”
Another note: I know it’s kind of the diagnosis of the day, but we (me, and our pediatrician) suspect that Solvi has/had some silent reflux that contributed to the 3-4 month Desperation Phase. In case you were wondering.
What has YOUR breastfeeding (or bottle feeding, or formula feeding) journey been like? Any fellow silent refluxers? I would love to hear your experiences.
How Much Do I Love This Squishy Feeder
Okay, on a much easier note, this squishy feeder is my favorite thing ever.
I know people are really excited about baby led weaning right now (aka giving young babies grabbable chunks of food rather than purees) but I am not one of those moms and I just know that about myself. I actually really enjoy the whole process: making the purees, interacting while feeding, etc. and I would happily spoon-feed her until the time when she’s ready for solid food at, say, 15 years old.
Okay, okay. Obviously a girl’s gotta learn to feed herself.
This little squishy feeder – can we just call it that? – is a happy middle ground for me. She can happily feed herself avocado, banana, peaches, etc. by mushing on the little top part and I don’t worry about her choking. ♡ Because believe it or not, I am a professional worried person! Shocking.
Heck Yes to Mozzarella Stuffed Arancini
And on the adult food front.
I made arancini with roasted red pepper sauce for dinner club last month and IT WAS LIT! The word “lit” has never actually come out of my mouth but when speaking about golden, crispy, panko-crusted deep fried mozzarella-stuffed fried risotto balls dipped in an olive-oily roasted red pepper sauce, what other word could there even be?
(Full dinner club menu: pesto wings, arancini, Italian soda and wine, roasted Parmesan and lemon broccoli, sausage and fennel rigatoni which has previously inspired date night pasta, and lemony cheesecake.)
I need to plan our next menu, like, today, actually. Got any ideas?
Overalls Are Baaaaack
My eighth grade self is FEELING THIS right now. And honestly, so is my 32 year old self. Welcome back, overalls. Welcome back.
I just bought a pair of fresh ones last week (These are the ones I bought) and I feel very happy about it.
I haven’t decided on shoes yet, and the model is wearing clogs but I’m not sure I’m a clogs kinda girl. So… I’ve got some work to do.
Overalls – yes / never again?
This Honest Mascara is Something Magical
I have very little in the way of REAL eyelashes, and I have super sensitive eyes. So I have been on the hunt for quite some time for a mascara that is:
B) Very, very effective
And after all that I’ve tried (Beautycounter, 100 Percent Pure, Pacifica, to name a few), I gotta say – this Honest mascara + primer is probably my favorite mascara I’ve ever used. Plus it’s clean. And $15. And can be picked up on a Target run.
I also snagged some Honest foundation primer, “blurring powder”, and face lotion (hello, sale) and I’m super impressed with all of it.
Clean beauty: Honest / Beautycounter / something else? Tell me what you like. (Also, I did a little demo on my Instagram stories over here if you wanna see this mascara in action.)
A Word From Sage
Sage has had a busy month doing… not a lot!
But she’s got a buddy now, and she wants to remind you that almost everything in life (including doing nothing) is better with a buddy.
That’s it! I hope it’s been an energized, springy month for you. And I hope you can find hope and love and courage in whatever challenges you’re facing right now. And I hope you have been putting a lot of extra cheezy garlic croutons on your kale and brussels salad.
These are the days!